Tag Archives: Family

Awakened.

The last few days I’ve been very cranky and complained a lot. I don’t do sick very well. Pneumonia. Acute Bronchitis. Influenza Like Illness – which is just flu’s evil twin. Pressure on my chest. runny nose. Cough, congestion, etc. This has not been a fun week. However, in the process of realizing just how hateful I was being to everyone around me, I decided to count my blessings.

My husband & I are not perfect, nor is our marriage. Many times we are on vastly different pages when it comes to the kids, depending on the kid. But he is mine & I am his. And mostly he’s tried to take care of me this week. As much I have allowed him to that is. He has yet to master mind reading. ūüôā

Our kids are far from perfect, but they are ours. Some days are calmer than others, but each kid is different and has different needs. I’ve been more than a little snappy, but they just keep loving me and telling me they hope I feel better soon. Well, except for when they’re saying I need a nap, which has been so true this week.

We have a roof over our heads, food in our pantry (for as long as it lasts with all of these bottomless pits running around!), beds to sleep in, and dirty laundry which means clothes to wear. We have some of the greatest friends anyone could ask for. Really, our most basic needs have always been met.

The last half of 2014 and most all of 2015 was incredibly rough. 2016 has started out not so great. When looking at all the things that have happened to us, it is so easy to see the negative at every turn. So easy in fact, it makes the positive needle in a haystack impossible. Even worse, it makes it so hard to pray because it has consumed us.

But, you know what? This year will be different. I have plans go make 2016 a phenomenal year. And, I cannot do that wallowing in the regrets, failures, and negatives of 2015.

The biggest blessing happened when I woke up today. I was honestly so scared last night that I wouldn’t wake up. Respiratory issues, however they are diagnosed, are super scary to me. I may have spent 5 hours this morning dealing with doctors, xrays, breathing treatments, and what have you.

But, I woke up.

Not just physically opening my eyes, but spiritually too. God and I had some serious words. Tears were shed. Seeing the things around me and not taking one ounce for granted. Reminding myself, and God, of His promises to me and mine.

Wake up.
I dare you.


Thanksgiving.

In an attempt to get back to writing everyday, I am planning to blog on a daily basis through the month of November. I figure if it takes twenty-one times to create a habit then thirty days of blogging should get me back to writing daily.

There is a slight ulterior motive here.

Last week I presented my senior proposal to the Capstone committee. If approved, I will need to get my¬†rear in gear in order to¬†complete my project on time. For those of you not familiar with¬†Capstone, let’s just say it is similar to writing and then defending a Master’s thesis, only on a¬†Bachelor level. The difference is that along with our projects, either creative or research, we have to create and present a visual element. All of this culminates into a final presentation in the¬†spring. It’s not as horrible as it sounds, now that the worst of it is finished. So, in theory, blogging daily is just my way of gearing up to write my story, and also¬†a way of letting the world know that there is much to be thankful for.

So, for today, what am I thankful for?

Many things actually.

My family. My parents who have encouraged me, throughout everything, to follow my heart. My sons for making me laugh on what seems to be¬†the darkest of days. My long-distance family with whom I communicate mainly via Facebook, thanks for the insights into your lives. My framily, those friends who are close enough to be family, thank you for always being there, and for being honest in everything – even when I’d rather you give me the sweetened up version.


Mondays.

Every Monday for the last four Mondays an email assignment has popped up in my email. Those assignments have allowed me to not only share about some pretty amazing people but to become part of an amazing group. There were incentives to participating in Compassion International‘s Blog Month but that is not why I contributed. I wrote because of the challenge. I write still because I cannot stop.

We sponsor a child, from Haiti. 

Without writing for Compassion International over the last month I wouldn’t have the knowledge and understanding I do now. I also wouldn’t have taken the steps to get to know other bloggers who do what I do. There are bloggers out there who I may have very little in common with, save two things:

We all love Jesus.

We all sponsor a child, some more than one.

Sponsor.

That is a fun word. My boys thought it meant they were getting a brother, something akin to adoption. And, they did. Although, our sponsored child is not coming to live with us he is still very much a part of our family. Every day we pray for each other and for our kiddo and if by chance I forget {we are still pretty new at this} the boys will stop me and say, “Mommy don’t forget the boy we’re helping raise and teach about Jesus! You know, the one who lives in Haiti!” ¬†{Typically they call him by name but I am still uncertain how much, if any, information I am at liberty to divulge via the internet.}

Our goal for blog month {September} was to get 3,108 children sponsored. When it was all said and done our total was 3,159 children sponsored. We not only met but exceeded our goal. What an amazing opportunity! We have this chance to speak life, love, and Jesus to these little people!

For the last month, I have greeted Mondays with expectancy, awaiting the newest challenge each week. Now that those assignments are complete, and our goal has been met, I am not finished. I have found a new way to begin my week by taking some time to think about, pray for, and write about my sponsored child.

Mondays have a new meaning.


Dear God.

Sponsoring a child is a huge decision, almost as big as having a new baby or getting married. How will I know if we pick the right one? What if something happens and we can’t continue our sponsorship? What then? This is a giant step and my brain is telling me no but my heart is screaming yes. I know it’s the right thing.

The boys are excited about helping out another child. They’ve been trying grasp what it’s like to not have education or food or water or shoes. All of those things we take for granted. They’ve already asked about sending him (they’re certain You will lead us to sponsor a boy!) toys to play with. And maybe some books.

The big thing is that I want to be able to show him (or her) You and to show Your love. I get stuck because I know I snap at my boys sometimes. I almost feel as though I’m not a good enough role model – not yet. I hope we’re always growing in Your word and showing your love for others.¬†God, I don’t know what You have planned but we are taking this next step. Jumping in feet first and trusting You to keep us above water.

Most importantly, Heavenly Father, please protect the child, whomever he or she may be. Wrap your loving arms around him or her and never let go.


Compassion.

I made an executive decision.

Instead of showering my children with presents for Christmas we are going to step outside the box. Don’t get me wrong. We will still celebrate Christmas but this year I’m striving to make the meaning of Christmas hit home for my boys, something more than presents under a tree.

We are adding to our family.

This is a HUGE deal.

Many of you may not know that I am a blogger for Compassion International. Now, I will fess up and say I have not blogged consistently over the last year. There are many reasons and excuses I could come up with, all true, but none more true than I just didn’t take the time. I am hoping to change that this month.

You see, this month is being deemed as BLOG MONTH for those at Compassion International. It is a month where I, along with my fellow bloggers, will be encouraging our readers to sponsor a child. Each week will have a new topic related to sponsoring, an act that is life changing. I have noticed, however, it has become increasingly difficult to encourage something I do not participate in myself. We do not currently sponsor a child. 

That is changing.

We will be sitting down over the next couple of weeks, as a family, in order to choose a child we can sponsor and watch grow as my own children grow. As soon as we have chosen a child to sponsor I will post about him or her here Рas much as I can anyway. Hopefully one day we will get to meet this, as of yet, unknown child. I wish we could help them all.

This is where YOU come in.

With all of the natural disasters that have hit around the world there is a much greater need than ever before. If you have the desire to help a region but are not sure how please consider being a sponsor. Sponsoring is easy. It only takes a few minutes to get set up and I can promise you it is one of the most meaningful decisions you will ever make.

I’ve heard it said many times over:

You may not be able to change the world

but you can change the world for one person.

That is exactly what sponsoring is; changing a child’s world.

FOREVER.

Like I said, it’s a HUGE deal.


When You Believe.

Whitney Houston - The Preacher's Wife

One of the most amazing voices in the music world is gone.

A tragic legacy left in her wake.

It amazes me somewhat, how very sad I am at her passing and, quite frankly, how ticked off I am at her as well. She had the resources and the support to get the help she so¬†desperately¬†needed these last few years. But, she didn’t. My mom summed it up best tonight when she said, “The heart loves who it loves” and, as saddened as I am, I see the truth in that statement.

Whitney Houston

There have been times in the past when I’ve wished I could be a person’s conscience. That voice of reasoning telling them right from wrong, and then consequently “forcing” that the correct choice be made. But I’m not. I’m no one’s conscience but my own. However, that thought gave me a distinct perspective.

Whitney Houston - The Bodyguard

God’s view.

God created us with free choice. He made us in His image but has allowed us to choose whether we follow the path He has marked out for us or a different path, made of more spontaneous, in-the-moment choices. I wonder sometimes if He sits there wishing, just like I have in the past, that He could “force” people into the right choices. But then the choice would not be freely made, and let’s face it, forcing people into¬†worshiping¬†something they didn’t choose is not the best way to get followers.

Whitney Houston

That is one of the best ways to make sure people resent you, forcing them to do something against their will.

Whitney Houston

I’ve also wondered at the heartbreak that would ensue with knowing beforehand the choices people will make, knowing their destinies could be changed at any moment.

Whitney Houston - The Artist

As much as I would like to be the one helping others choose the right choices, the fact of the matter is that none of us know what we would do in any given situation until we are actually staring it in the face. We all say, “I’d choose xxx decision” but reality is that we just don’t know.

Whitney Houston

Just like we don’t know the people we’ll touch.

Whitney Houston - The Artist

Just like we don’t know the days we’re allowed.

Whitney Houston - The Bodyguard

* * *

There are so many songs lyrics I could post that would be fitting for these circumstances but I believe these are the best. Whitney, you came into this world singing “Jesus Loves Me” almost from the time you could speak and you left his world singing “Jesus Loves Me”. I truly hope you are resting in Jesus’ loving arms.

Whitney Houston

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sfhb4S2tc1I

When You Believe

Many nights we’ve prayed
With no proof anyone could hear
In our hearts a hopeful song
We barely understood
Now we are not afraid
Although we know there’s much to fear
We were moving mountains
Long before we knew we could
There can be miracles
When you believe
Though hope is frail
It’s hard to kill
Who knows what miracles
You can achieve
When you believe
Somehow you will
You will when you believe
In this time of fear
When prayer so often proves in vain
Hope seemed like the summer birds
Too swiftly flown away
Yet now I’m standing here
My heart’s so full I can’t explain
Seeking faith and speaking words
I never thought I’d say
There can be miracles
When you believe
Though hope is frail
It’s hard to kill
Who knows what miracles
You can achieve
When you believe
Somehow you will
You will when you believe
They don’t always happen when you ask
And it’s easy to give in to your fear
But when you’re blinded by your pain
Can’t see your way safe through the rain
Thought of a still resilient voice
Says love is very near
There can be miracles
When you believe
Though hope is frail
It’s hard to kill
Who knows what miracles
You can achieve
When you believe
Somehow you will
Now you will
You will when you believe
You will when you believe
Just believe
Gotta believe
You will when you believe

(All images and lyrics found via internet searches utilizing the Google.)


A Thankful Heart | Day 7.

I know I’ve said family already but for today I want to focus on my children:

Eman & ZigZag

There are no words to express all of the¬†emotions that go along with Mommyhood. It’s a whole new world that is constantly changing.¬†If you have¬†more than one child,¬†the milestones reached with the oldest are not necessarily how things will happen when the youngest reaches those same milestones. It is amazing to me how incredibly dissimilar yet alike my boys are. They both have fairly happy dispositions most of the time. Yet, even when they’re happy there’s such a difference of expression from one to the other.

I have learned more about myself in the last seven {and a half!} years than I’ve probably learned in the last thirty combined. New ways of teaching, giving, receiving. There just aren’t words enough to express how much I love these little dudes and how drastically they’ve changed my life {for the better!}.

ZigZag will make up little songs that say, “I love you Mommy” in them.

Eman will come up as though he has something very serious to say and then wink at me before giving me the biggest hug.

To quote the movie Something’s Gotta Give¬†“They make me want to be a better person”.

I just love them!


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